Just thought I'd mention that.
Anyway, if you are planning on betting anytime soon, don't wager dessert. You could end up in the poor house. Nevertheless, that obscene dollar amount does exactly what it is meant to do. After all, you would never have heard of Sri Lanka otherwise. Well that's an overstatement, but you get the point.
Anyway, the possibility of commenting on the NL playoff races is nil. If I were to say something it would be pointless in a few minutes.
BTW, we all know I cachinnate at both soccer and women's "sports", so you'd think I would find nothing interesting about the grandnanny of them all, women's soccer. Not so. To prove I am not sexist, I will talk about women's soccer.
The #1 ranked U.S. women's soccer team lost 4-0 (ouch!) in the world cup semis the other day. This would be simply a bad loss if not for the fact that the U.S. Women's goalkeeper was a 36 year old goalie who hadnt played since june, as opposed to Hope Solo (no relation to a certain smuggler) who had not given up a goal in 300 minutes. Seriously. I know nothing about soccer but I know you don't take out a sizzling goaltender to bring in a 36 year old who hasnt played in months. So their coach is an idiot right? Yes. And apparently I'm not the only one who thinks so.
Unfortunately Hope apologized for her rant, bringing me to my knees in frustration at the endless list of people who deliver apologies for things that weren't that bad in the first place. Her team got beaten 4-0 and she was probably right when she said it wouldn't have happened if she had been in there. Even if she was wrong--she said it, she thought it, she still thinks it, and who the heck is she convincing with this ersatz apology anyway?
To those who doubted Randy Moss:
5 catches, 115 yards, 2 TDs
heh
heh
heh
To those who root for the Titans: Well they won. They beat a terrible team but they are 2-1.
Mort Report Retort:
This just in, the Bears are changing quarterbacks.
The Mets would like to get some wins these days, since they are losing a lot.
The Yankees are in the playoffs? Weren't they 14 1/2 back?
The Colts won the SuperBowl last year.
Tiki Barber retired, so the Giants don't have him anymore.
The Saints had one of the top offenses in the league last year, so expect them to score points.
Honorary Mention, courtesy of John Madden (this quote is actually real!) "When you talk about a Norv Turner offense, you're usually talking about an offense."
(I guess sometimes you are actually talking about defense...?)
Yankees win wild card. Now all they have to do is avoid the Angels. Oh sure. That'll happen...
~The Sports Maunderer~
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13 comments:
LONG LIVE THE MORT REPORT RETORT!!!
I hate it when ppl apologize like that too. esp when you know they don't mean it, just their pr person told them to.
I love how you tie in random trivia facts into your posts. but seriously Sri Lanka, chocolate pudding is like 50 cents a box...make it AT LEAST chocolate cake - that usually retails at $3 a box.
I looked at the comments first so now I will read it but Mary's comments always make me laugh too.
I just love this blog--keep it up
Now I've read it and you just crack me up when you talk about women's sports--you really can't speak of them without the sarcasm spilling onto the keyboard!! BTW, I know who that 36 year old is, and she has been an unbelievable athlete up until that game!!!!!!
The older goalie apparently did well against Brazil in the past...you know, when she was 32,28, etc. Still, the whole game was a mess and we got stomped by Brazil's obscenely good women's player, Marta (yes, she only has one name).
Anyways, as large as my distaste for women's soccer is, their commercials with Rainn Wilson in them are fairly hilarious.
I tend to view them more as Rainn Wilson commercials that happen to have female soccer players in them...
Not bad for a Panther.
Go Hoyas....
Double post, sorry...
next time you do this little number-
women's "sports"
-I may have to un-renew my subscription. I love you brother but it pisses me off and you know that it does and you know I'm not saying it for the sake of political correctness.
just remember that venus could beat you up. and really, there are a lot of women who take their "sport" pretty seriously and sometimes the way you talk about it is just.plain.mean. and goes beyond simple screw-PC-thinking-truth-telling fun. because I can appreciate the latter.
that said, I for one am thrilled that the yankees will not be playing the angels in the 1st round (I think I'm right about this, but of course could be wrong seeing as I am a woman and should probably confine myself to the world of "sports")
Taking one's sports seriously does not make one's sport serious.
Being able to beat me up is no major feat.
Anyway, I find it wonderful that females enjoy playing sports. But that doesn't mean I have to suffer through watching them.
I mean, I love playing Ultimate--but if people don't like watching Ultimate, I can understand why.
Regardless, Hope Solo is a really cool name.
I have no problem with the fact that you don't want to watch women's sports. I don't watch them either.
I have a problem with the fact that you extend this personal distaste as a criterion of credibility for women's sports in general in distinction from men's sports -hence "women's sports".
and as for being serious, I don't think that any men's sport can claim that either. they get paid to handle a ball. most definitely NOT as serious as getting paid (albeit in pennies) to read books...
12...now 13 comments...this is rivaling some of the more outrageous post hills in number of responses.
As for watchable women's sport(s): Olympic ice curling.
It doesn't get better than that.
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